The Weekly Found $$$$$$$$$$$$ Report!!
Volume 5, Number 3


IN THIS ISSUE:

1] Tips from the Peanut Gallery!
2] Strange and/or Relevant Questions I have Received!

3] General News!

4] Last week's total!

5] Money reported this week!

6] Grand total to date!


1] Tips from the Peanut Gallery!

How to Make a Chainsaw Arm!
Bruce Campbell made chainsaw arms famous in his portrayal of Ash Williams in the Sam Raimi action-horror movie classics “Evil Dead,” “Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn” and “Army of Darkness.” In the films, Bruce Campbell sports a chainsaw over his stump of an arm and wields it into a zombie-ridden crowd. Read on to find out how to make your own chainsaw arm to fight zombies during Halloween!
1. Decide which arm you want to have your chainsaw arm.
2. Apply a generous amount of glue to the top side of the glove.
3. Attach the underside of your toy chainsaw handle to the topside of the glove.
4. Press with heavy books to keep the glue and chainsaw close and allow the glue to fully adhere.
5. Let dry for at least 1 hour.

2] Strange and/or Relevant Questions I have Received!

Q: How do earthworms digest their food?

A: Since it has no jaws or teeth, the earthworm uses its muscular pharynx to suck in soil containing food. The food particles and soil go through a long esophagus into a round organ called a crop. Then it is forced into the gizzard. The gizzard contracts and expands, causing grains of sand and food to rub together. In this way, the food is ground up. Digestion is made significantly more easy if the worm has at least one chainsaw arm.

Q: Ah.


3] General News!

Bat Boy Found In Cave Making Space Alien Luring Chainsaw Arms to Lure Space Aliens to his Lair, says source. A source has revealed to The Weekly Found $$$ Report that the famous Bat Boy of Baseline Burger Barn has been found making Space Alien Luring Chainsaw Arms to lure Space Aliens to his Lair. His reasoning is unclear. "We're not clear about his reasoning," said the source, "but we know that he's been making several Space Alien Luring Chainsaw Arms to lure Space Aliens to his Lair." The source also revealed that there was not just one but several Space Alien Luring Chainsaw Arms being constructed but that the Bat Boy's reasoning is still unclear. "The Bat Boy's reasoning is still somewhat unclear," revealed the source, adding that several of the mysterious Space Alien Luring Chainsaw Arms had been constructed by the Bat Boy for an unclear reason other than to lure Space Aliens to his Lair.

4] Last week's total!
* We started the week with (give or take) $223.01

5] Money reported this week!

+ Kimmy's 25 cents from a Dangerousway cart found in the cart thingy while walking through the parking lot on her way to the pub to play pool with the Writer in Residence.
+ Sandy and Sig's $1.70 a-like so: 6 safeway carts. (on a lovely day in the middle of the afternoon) and one water bottle and one old faithful lucky lager in my ditch!! My apologies! This should have been in last week's report!!!!!!
+ Sandy's 25 cents (every one counts) from one cart even though it was SNOWING.
+ Sandy's 75 cents (it was -1 so she thought it should have been more but that's a pretty good haul!)
+ Kim's 1 cent at Stu's pub under the foot of the visiting Writer in Residence. he stepped off it to play his turn at the pool table, and i nabbed it!
+ Karen's TOONIE!!!! at the florist counter at the Dangerousway!
+ Kim's 10 cents in the College parking lot
+ Sandy's $1.00 from driving around Dangerousway lots when she was supposed to be racing home with Sig's prescriptions. as she says, "i know. i'm a rotten wife."
+ Sandy's 10 cents from one bottle somewhere
+ Karen's 22 cents from 2 cans and 2 pennies outside the school yard on a dog walk.
+ Sandy and Sig's $1.75 a-like so: "loooooonnnniiieeeeee AT SUPER STORE!!!! one safeway cart and five drink containers in the ditch. one dr, pepper, one "monster energy drink", and two lucky lager (old faithful)"
+ Sandy's 50 cents from 4 bottles and a lucky lager can in the ditch. (those teenagers shore do drink a heap o' Lucky Lager in mom's ditch!)
+ Sandy's 25 from one "measly" Dangerousway cart. Mother! Every One Counts!



For a total this week of $8.88 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Our grand total is now:

$231.89!!!!!!!!!

$105.71 is the final total for the Xmas Dinner Fund.

$126.18 is currently in the Charity Fund.